Teaching Alternatives to Problem Behavior

When your child is having frequent meltdowns, hitting, screaming, or refusing to follow directions, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and discouraged.

As a parent, you may find yourself asking:“Why is this happening?”“How can I help them stop?”“What else can they do instead?”

At Pathways 2 Potential, we hear these questions every day—and they are valid, important, and brave. The truth is, all behavior happens for a reason. And behind every challenging behavior is a child trying to communicate a need in the best way they know how.

The good news? We can teach them a better way.

Understanding the Function of Behavior

In Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA), we don’t just focus on stopping “bad” behavior—we look deeper. We ask why a behavior is happening and what the child is trying to achieve. This is called understanding the function of behavior.

Problem behaviors usually serve one (or more) of the following functions:

• To gain attention

• To escape or avoid something difficult or unpleasant

• To access a preferred item or activity

• To meet a sensory need

  
  

Once we understand the “why,” we can start teaching a more appropriate “how.”

What Are Alternative Behaviors?

Alternative behaviors are safer, more effective ways for your child to get their needs met. For example:

Problem Behavior	Possible Alternative
Screaming for attention	Saying “look at me” or tapping gently
Hitting to escape a task	Asking for a break or saying “I need help”
Throwing toys to get a snack	Pointing to or requesting the snack using words or a picture
Running away when overwhelmed	Using a calming strategy like deep breaths or asking for quiet time

Our goal is not to suppress behavior—but to replace it with something more functional and empowering.

How We Teach Alternatives at Pathways 2 Potential

At Pathways 2 Potential, we use positive, evidence-based methods to help children learn new behaviors that work better for them—and for you.

Here’s what that looks like:

1. We Observe and Listen

We take the time to get to know your child—their preferences, triggers, strengths, and struggles. We work closely with you to identify patterns and understand the context of the behavior.

2. We Identify the Need Behind the Behavior

If your child is biting when they’re overwhelmed or crying when they want a toy, we look at what they’re trying to communicate. Behavior is a form of communication, even when it’s hard to interpret.

3. We Teach Skills That Work

Using gentle, individualized strategies, we teach your child how to use words, gestures, pictures, or other tools to express themselves. This might mean working on:

• Communication (verbal or nonverbal)

• Self-advocacy (“help please,” “all done”)

• Coping strategies (deep breathing, asking for space)

• Social skills (turn-taking, sharing)

  
  

We make learning fun, positive, and meaningful—because kids learn best when they feel successful and supported.

4. We Coach Parents Along the Way

You’re with your child more than anyone else. That’s why we work hand-in-hand with you to practice these strategies at home and in real-life situations. Parent coaching is a powerful part of behavior change—and we’ll be by your side every step of the way.

Progress Is Possible—With Patience and Partnership

Changing behavior doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time, repetition, and lots of encouragement. But we’ve seen again and again that children who once struggled with intense behaviors can learn new ways to express themselves—and thrive.

At Pathways 2 Potential, we’re not here to “fix” your child. We’re here to help them feel seen, heard, and capable. And we’re here to support you, too.

If your child is struggling with problem behavior, know this: there is hope, and there are tools that work.

Let’s work together to find the path forward.